I remember back as a young teenage girl telling my mom “Let me make my own mistakes!” These are words that likely broke her heart and left her feeling helpless. As a mom of two teenage girls, I am going through some of the same things. I have a 16-year old that thinks she is invincible and that nothing is going to happen to her. And I have a 14-year old that thinks that life is a party and there’s not a care or a worry in the world. As their mom, I want to teach them everything I know about life. I want to sit by their bedside and talk to them for hours about the things going on in their day to day lives. I want to hold their hand and stroke their hair when they are sad about something. I want to teach them everything I know about boys, sex, alcohol & drugs so that “they don’t make the same mistakes I did.” How many times have we all heard that in our lifetime? What do you think their reaction is? “Mom, let me make my own mistakes!” Famous last words. “Let me make my own mistakes”…and we do! We make all kinds of mistakes in our lifetime.
As a mom who is post-abortive, I am overprotective of my girls. Not gonna try to candy coat that one. I have tried my absolute hardest (because of my past) to make sure that they will not make the same mistakes I have made. While there is a fine line of effective parenting and overprotective parenting, this is one of those that I hover in the overprotective area most of the time. Because of my sin and my past, I have a tendency to try and shield my girls from anything over a PG13 rating. This causes a lot of tension and frustration in our home at times because I don’t want them to be damaged. I don’t want their innocence to be stripped from them like it was for me. I am coming to the harsh reality that I am going to have to let the ropes out a little bit and allow them to experience life. My oldest is almost 17 and eighteen is right around the corner! Sooner than I can blink she will be going off to college! As a mom who is post-abortive I am having anxieties about sending her off in a year and a half. Have I allowed her to grow up enough to be able to handle college…and boys…and partying…?? Yikes…
While I can sit here all day long & worry about how I have parented the girls, I also have a deep trust that God knows and cares for each of them. They both decided at fairly young ages to follow Jesus, but do they really know what it means to seek Him? I don’t think so. They’ve had a lot of their life handed to them in a Disney-like fashion where they haven’t had to really trust Jesus for a lot yet. It seems in life that the times when we seek out God is when we are at our lowest points. When we are desperate for a situation to be different is when we truly seek Him. I know this to be true in my own life.
It reminds me of the story of Job in the Bible. He was a Christian man who was devoted to following Christ. His life was pretty comfortable. He had his health, wealth, a wife & children until one day tragedy struck his life. His family, his property and his health were stripped from him and he was left with nothing but his faith in God. That was when he truly sought after God! I know it’s sad to think that we could treat our Creator like that, but we do.
As a mom, or a dad, who is having anxieties about parenting your children, place your trust in God. That is the only place that I have found that I can have true peace about all of the junk we have to go through in life. Say a prayer right now and ask Him to give you peace & understanding and wisdom to know what is right for your family. I place an enormous amount of faith in the hands of my Father because I know he is the ultimate parent. He is the Prince of Peace. Psalm 9:10 says, “Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.” He has never forsaken those who seek him! That is where my joy and peace comes from and I can draw strength and courage from that.
May God bless you this Christmas season. See you in the New Year!
nikiezzell
Victory Over Abortion 